Step Away From The Circle And Nobody Gets Hurt

My best friend brought canned tuna almost every day for lunch when we were in school. The mean kids made fun of her AND me just by association. At the time, I didn’t understand what was up with the tuna. Maybe they were upset about the dolphins dying after getting caught in the nets. Maybe their parents were too cheap to splurge on seafood for them, and they were jealous. 

Maybe they knew the vulgar meaning of Tuna Town long before we did. Yeah, that was it. 

I’ve always been a mile outside of the circle. The last to know. The least likely to fit in. Yet—the most likely to Not. Give. A. Shit. 

Until … I began my writing journey. Self-publishing has made the world my vagina-smelling oyster. All I have to do is BE POPULAR!








RELATABLE. <— Oh. Fuck. I’m in trouble. 

I can suppress my un-relatable-ness (because that’s a real word) and write the same characters over and over because there’s a stereotype of the characters most readers love, OR I can write what’s inside me which is a cluster fuck of characters that are unique, daring, bold, crazy, and a mile outside of the circle. 



Maybe they make you laugh at their ridiculousness. 

Maybe they make you scream because they are stubborn to their own demise. 

Maybe they make you think about something in a way you never imagined. And maybe, just maybe that makes them memorable, endearing, admirable, commendable, and … lovable. 

Scarlet Stone is coming on December 10th and she is UNFORGETTABLE. 


Jewel,  Warrior of the Earth, Defender of the Herbivores, Least Likely to Be Homecoming Queen

**This blog is dedicated to everyone who started their period before their friends, thought blow jobs were how you dried your hands in public restrooms, and at the tender age of eight, found a condom in a moving box marked “toiletries” and tried to blow it up like a balloon but wondered why it was so wet.